Today was a good day. My best friend, Mina and I visited with Riker together and she was very much like she normally was. She's a whole pound lighter and feels like my baby when I hold her except for all the tubes and wires that hang off her body. She fussed and cried a lot but it was her normal complaining that I've grown so accustomed to over the last 4 months.
Because of the puking yesterday, I found out that they had not fed her anything through her NG tube since the last time she threw up. They had switched to giving here nutrition through IV which sounded like a set back to me. They did, however, let me breastfeed. Riker was so excited to feed and made the familiar content moaning as she ate just like both my girls did when they fed. Just like yesterday, she kept the breastmilk down when I fed her directly.
As I was getting ready to leave, the nurse indicated that she would be letting the doctors know that they shouldn't fortify her breastmilk because it doesn't agree with her. I asked her what she meant by "fortify." This is when I found out THEY HAVE BEEN MIXING HER BREASTMILK WITH FORMULA!!! I am livid. The doctors have been sharing all the details of her treatment but no one bothered to share or ask me about this. Apparently, they were doing this so that she'd get the calories she needs.
Breastmilk has comparable calories to formula and this was unnessary stress on my little girl. Perhaps my baby wouldn't have been puking and struggling so much yesterday if they hadn't done this. Surely she's not getting the calories she needs if she's puking up her meals! Clearly the breastmilk agrees with her much better.
I have been pumping like crazy every 2 hours at home, taking supplements and drinking teas to keep my supply up for her. The hospital currently has 80 ounces of my milk on hand. The is simply no excuse for this and I feel as though they kept it from me.
I feel betrayed!
The picture above is what my daughter looks with a full belly of gentle mother's milk that she can digest and keep down. They damn well better not make such a decision without consulting me again! The doctors are going to get a piece of my mind tomorrow.